Oh idiot, my idiot (a KamiJiro OneShot)
by Thoth's Quill
Summary: A lazy morning for the pro-hero couple of Chargebolt and Earphone Jack


Oh idiot, my idiot (KamiJiro OneShot)

[From: Dank-I (Jamming-Whey), 4:03 a.m.]

"Do you think women have boob hair like men have chest hair?"

Jirou's phone lit up at four in the morning and blared her rather loud text message notification, forcing her to groan from her sleep as she blinked one bleary eye awake. She swore. If Denki was having one of those late night "thinking sessions"—

"God fucking damn it, Denki," she groaned, running one hand through her hair before texting him back.

[From: JiroJax, 4:08 a.m.]

"boy im deadass going to beat ur ass up tomorrow morning I s2g it's fucking 4 am wtf r u doing up?"

She sighed before tossing her phone back onto her bedside table and flopping down. She hated him sometimes. Oh it wasn't like she didn't love him. But she'd be damned if she didn't realize how much of a god damned idiot Denki really was, sometimes. He was an idiot. But regrettably, he was _her_ idiot. It didn't help that Denki was literally laying there. Right fucking next to her.

There went the blare of the text message again.

[From: Dank-I (Jamming-Whey), 4:12 a.m.]

"BUT WHAT IF THEY HAD BOOB HAIR?! DO U HAVE BOOB HAIR? KYOKA U GOTTA TELL ME!"

Two things went through her mind that moment. How in the hell had she fallen in love with this idiot, and how was he _this_ stupid?!

[From: JiroJax, 4:15 a.m.]

"thats it. Im going to bed. I s2g u text me 1 more time ill literally smack u"

Denki let out a soft whistle as he read Kyoka's text, right before the phone fell from his hands and smacked him in the face. That wasn't what caused a soft chuckle from Kyoka as she slowly drifted back to sleep next to him. Nope. Not at all. Still, note to self, don't mess with girlfriend when it's 4 something am. Not that he paid attention to every single time he made that particular note to self. Nearly half his texts to her were like this. Kyoka, of course, had fallen asleep once more. Denki, however, just couldn't. He groaned slowly as he swung his legs off of the bed and slowly got to his feet, static electricity not affecting him in the slightest as his toes dug into the carpet. Why the hell was he up this early? Only God and Ryan Reynolds knew, and neither of them were talking.

Denki slowly made his way to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Denki and mornings went like Robert Downey, Jr. and sobriety, but here he was, awake at 4:20 a.m., brushing his teeth. The meme wasn't lost on him and he couldn't help but snort after having spat out the toothpaste. Brushing and flossing aside, today was his off day. And Kyoka's for that matter. A lazy day for the two Heroes. Denki slowly made his way past the shag carpeting of their bizarre purple-yellow amalgamation wallpapered bedroom into the much more… normal living room. Flopping down on the couch after turning on his TV and his gaming console, he started playing a video game.

Time passed. It was a lazy day. Two hours into grinding on some sort of Destiny 2 styled game, Denki yawned and stretched out his arms. He screwed his eyes shut as he stretched, feeling his shoulder joints pop slightly. Then he felt fingers, long, thin fingers, scratch through his hair against his scalp and that groan turned into an all-out purr as he nuzzled against Kyoka's hand. Kyoka, dressed in one of his tank-tops and flannel pajamas. She looked absolutely out of it. Neither of them were morning people. "Morning," he mumbled, giving her his best lazy, bleary, stupid smile.

Kyoka stared at him, deadpan before breaking into a little smirk. "I'm still fucking mad at you, dumbass," she grumbled

"Wha—why?!" Denki whined out

"Do boobs have hair? Are you legit for real?" she scoffed

"I was having an existential crisis while you were sleeping! Cut me some slack!" he defended weakly. He knew he fucked up that morning.

"You're gonna be having an existential crisis where you wonder if your ass is about to exist or not in a second," she retorted. She was definitely all bark this morning, but like always, her threats were merely words. She still smirked at him before leaning down to kiss the top of his head. "Get up, asshole, you're making the coffee today."

Denki groaned, setting the controller down. "Why don't _you_ make the coffee?"

"Because I have to deal with your night time texts." Ouch.

Denki couldn't help but snicker as he got to his feet. As he passed by her, he yelped. Did she smack his ass? She'd neither confirm nor deny it as she now purloined the abandoned controller to continue playing his game as he went ahead and started on the coffee machine.

"Hey babe?" he called out. "Where's the creamer?" he asked, as he started putting bread on the frying pan. God knows they needed a new toaster, considering their old one had stopped working

"Somewhere you won't find it! Why don't you stop being a pussy and start drinking coffee black?" She called back.

"I will! The moment you start going to Starbucks and getting pumpkin spice lattes." He retorted. The thing was, Kyoka wouldn't be caught dead with a pumpkin spice latte in hand. Controller forgotten, she jumped off the couch.

"That's it! I'm kicking your ass!" She yelled playfully, as Denki laughed, running off towards the kitchen, sprinting around the island, Kyoka leaning down against the other side, glaring daggers at him, looking like she was about to pounce but still grinning at him.

Kyoka Jiro, the chill, quiet musician of Class 1-A was never in a shell when she was with Denki. She was relaxed. She was herself in a way she so fundamentally enjoyed that she never dreamed of life without this feeling. Sure, she was relaxed. Sure she was still mellow, but Denki had gotten her out of her shell. And sure, cuddling was fun, but ending up in his arms in a tickle fight on the kitchen island after having pounced on him only for him to grab her by her waist and pull her up against his chest honestly didn't seem to be a bad idea. Until she started to lose said tickle fight.

She cheated. Stunning him lightly with an earphone jack to the neck, she caught him still.

"Gotcha!" she purred

"N-no fair!" Denki hissed against her ear.

She bit lightly at his neck before leaning up to kiss his lips.

And then the smell of burnt toast permeated the room.

"I love you, babe, but you're a god damned idiot," she groaned, exasperated by her boyfriend's obliviousness. She sighed, resting her forehead against his chest, breathing in his scent for a second. She wanted to be grumpy. She couldn't. She didn't want to smile, but she ended up with her little smirk anyways.

Denki snickered a bit. "That was on you." He pointed out. He wasn't wrong. She was the one who chased after him anyways when he dared to mention her and pumpkin spice lattes in the same sentence.

"Whatever," she huffed, ruffling her hair before he let her go. "I can't hate you. Like, at all!" She grumbled in mock frustration. "You're an idiot. But you're _my_ idiot."


End file.
